Hi! I’m Rob Rex, and at 11 PM on Tuesday, September 15 I found out that I have a brain tumor. The plan was never to write a blog because I hoped this would be scary but short term event, then a nice smooth recovery. Unfortunately, that would not be my story – because of some bad tumor news (really, is there any other kind?) my story is going to be more of an adventure than it event and somehow a blog feels like a great way to share the journey.
- Family is my everything. I have a beautiful wife, Jenn, of 13 years that is dealing with between 10x and 20x the challenges I am facing. She is our protector, the rock that grounds our family and makes it all work, the place we come back to every time something goes wrong, and the purest, kindest heart I know. She also takes several hero turns throughout the stories that will follow. We are blessed with 4 smallish children. A double stuffed Oreo of two boys and two girls, with boys on both ends. Luke – 9, Taylor – 8, Kate – 6, Grayson – 3. I won’t get any further into family here because 50% of the reason I’m excited to write this blog is the family post(s). I plan on going through 10,000 family pictures to pick out the ones that most represent our little crew and while 99% of it will never make it into the blog it’s the kind of exercise I can get excited about.
- I am an extrovert in the purest sense. A people-powered person. Every day I derive gratitude and love from the people I am surrounded by and if I’m around you’ll know it. I’m big, 6′ 2″ 220 pounds, I’m loud with a deep voice, and I’m not shy about sharing. I am a morning person that starts almost every day with a walk to clear my head and come up with a plan then spends the rest of the day motivated by all the people I get to interact with. I am also a very direct person and I suspect that will come out in this blog. Most people categorize me as highly positive because when you ask me what is going on 95% of the time the answer is ‘life is good’ with a funny story – because that is what I feel >95% of the time. But the people that know me best and longest know to be careful with that question because I believe in talking things out instead of letting them fester so I might have a problem with how one of your people treated my people or I might be having trouble getting over the refs giving Lebron James a foul call every time he crashes into a defender with his shoulder enabling a soulless Lakers squad to advance past a plucky, fun Nuggets team. These are things that must be discussed.
- I am a nerd. Or as my sister has always said an engi-nerd. With a background in technology and a love of math and reading and science fiction and fantasy and historical fiction novels and video games (mostly silly iphone games these days, Fallout Mobile has been my guilty pleasure in rehab, but I’ve had my Candy Crush and Clash of Clans phases as well) and Star Wars and all of the other goofy traits that being a nerd entails. I was excited for the world to learn about Game of Thrones but also quietly offended every time they didn’t call it a song of Ice & Fire – like they were sneaking into a secret place I had enjoyed for years. As I have become a connoisseur of fine MRIs over the last few weeks I’m the kind of guy that counts the buzzes and beeps and screeches and wonders why there are 13 each time and why they choose to take pictures at those angles and whether that first click was a picture or repositioning. When the fancy Johns Hopkins machine moves me slightly less distance but more often does that matter? and how are they knitting together the images? There is an argument that I was cool from age 23-28 working at a hip digital agency, running with a fun crew in Boston and hitting the Cape and clubs in Vegas and Miami and DC every couple weekends but that phase lasted JUST long enough to land the girl of my dreams and the story is pretty much pure nerd on either end of that magical, anomalous run.
- I love sports. Golf is my favorite outlet because it allows me to indulge my competitiveness and my two favorite vices (a few drinks, and the occasional wager – always within reason… Of course…). I came into the summer as an eight handicap and my lowest score of the year was the very first round I played which in hindsight might’ve been the very first indication something was wrong in my noggin. But I love all sports and competitions, played many, and will watch anything. I don’t really like classic TV and get left out of all watercooler conversations, but I’ll flip to watch the Canadian rugby team in a tournament even though I’m not totally familiar with the rules and have only a generally positive friendly vibe for our northern neighbors. I’ve always been very active as are my kids and family – just getting out “doing stuff” brings me great joy and takes up most of my time. In fact, one of the things that confused my body so much through all of this is how active and healthy I was through COVID lockdown walking several miles every morning and getting back into roughhousing with the kids with all the extra time at home.
- I love technology, progress, and new experiences. I’ve built a career around technology-enabled experiences, entrepreneurship, and media (particularly digital) that I am incredibly proud of and is a huge part of my identity. A phenomenal experience where a brand like Hilton or Southwest, or a really good fast food ordering kiosk system that leverages technology, data, people, and beautiful visual and information design can absolutely make my day and I just want to share those experiences and positive vibes with the world. On the other hand, a bad experience with Verizon customer service or my deep frustration with the insidiousness of social media and how a potentially wonderful concept is being distorted to harm our communities, our mental health, and our children for profit leaves me incredibly frustrated and viscerally angry. I work at 9 Rooftops marketing running the Baltimore office, having returned because of the wonderful people after a couple of years away in the corporate world and also run a successful small company Power Target which operates ElectricityRates.com. If you haven’t considered switching your electricity provider you should. Competition is a good and healthy thing especially when the local public utility commissions can get out of the way. If you’re on the fence choose Constellation, they’re the best there is. I work a lot of hours but the people that I work with are many of my favorite people on earth and they have rallied around me in the last 2 weeks like you would not believe. ‘I got 99 problems but my work ain’t 1’ and I hope the ~2 dozen people that have made that the case get a warm feeling inside at least once a day because they will never understand the positive impact they are having on my mental health.
- Lastly – and importantly – NO ONE is better set up to tackle this thing – whatever it is – than I am. I have the top doctors in the world, I’m 20 years younger than most people that experience this, years of being so active has my body responding amazingly, Team Rex is supporting me every step of the way, and I figure it can’t hurt to be this ridiculously good looking. On the 6th I get a playbook of what is to come, but I’m chasing edge cases and features in medical journals. As my sister says so succinctly ‘it is what is it’ and as I respond to her every time – ‘bring it on’.
Why Am I Writing This Blog?
1) COVID rules make Rob go crazy. Approaching the launch of this blog I am in a rehab facility with one visitor a day and I get exhausted after about an hour of even basic conversation. There is a lot of time to stare at walls and a lot of crazy thoughts and emotions bouncing around in here. I need an outlet.
2) I want to remember and learn everything from this experience. It has already been incredibly transformative and my journey is only beginning. While there are certainly some downsides… Okay potentially there are many, many, downsides… I’m also already enjoying the experience of thinking through my priorities, how I spend my time, the role of community, and things that I would like to change about my worldview. I have always been pretty good about enjoying the moment, the people around me, and appreciating all of the blessings I have lived, but there is certainly a newfound depth. I also hope there are some insights to be gleaned by joining me on this journey and ‘riding alongside’ because so far being in the saddle has been pretty rough.
3) I want to feel the progress. Recovery from major brain surgery is not a linear path in the cleanest of circumstances. Given how little I currently know about what’s actually going on in my head, the range of outcomes and adventures I may be facing is wide. But I have already experienced some amazing progress and I am thrilled with how my body is responding. Three days ago when I asked my left foot to move it only responded 20% of the time and I never knew when that would be. Today I can get it to move every time. It is not exactly mastering that buttery fade I had been working on, but it is incredibly meaningful and these victories are highly motivating.
Requests of the Reader – and yes I am using that singular – Hi Mom
- I have organizes this as simply as possible so you can choose how to consume the content. If you are new to this type of blog check out Navigating Recursive Thoughts.
- I am aware this is a narcissistic and at times very heavy blog because this really only works if I keep it as real as possible. Think of this as Caring Bridge, not TMZ. If you find yourself not enjoying it or liking me less as you read the posts – please stop reading! – and I’ll give you all you need to know the next time we share a beer together
- I will repeat myself. There are mantras and stories that will motivate me a lot along this journey and it is therapeutic to repeat these important beliefs.
I would love to hear your thoughts on anything and everything. The texts and calls and emails I am getting have really helped me through all of this – that people-powered person stuff above is real. So please reach out with ideas, images I should use, tech issues, points of confusion, and general UX complaints
Just text me or email me at rob.rex@gmail.com